Season 2, Episode 3: “Support Drag Story Hour”
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Doris: [00:00:03] Hello Listeners. I’m just popping in to make sure you’ve all heard the news about the recent uptick of extreme right wing groups working to ban LGBTQ+ books from the Children’s section of the public libraries.
So do you know who’s fighting that battle? The busiest group of people I know have taken their precious time to bring LGBTQ+ representation into the libraries: Drag Queens.
Folks, the Drag Queens don't just Lip-sync – they have a voice too, and they can use it to read stories to children!
That’s right. They’ve even formed their own non-profit organization: “Drag Story Hour!”
Now if this doesn’t sound like the best time a kid could have at the library, I don’t know what does!
And let’s be honest – I'm sure it is more engaging than the Children's Librarian reading books to kids. Though they have their own special talents, I cannot guarantee they will have a charismatic performer’s aura or any stage experience whatsoever.
[00:01:14] So it’s disappointing that extremists are trying to ruin all the fun for this extraordinary opportunity for children.
They should count their lucky stars “Drag Story Hour” is in their city. Because if they don’t like that, how would they like “Depressed Lesbian Story Hour” instead?
Honestly, they probably wouldn’t even notice. At “Depressed Lesbian Story Hour,” there is no glitter. There is no makeup or sequins. No uppity high heels or pantyhose. You will never see a 7-foot tall person wearing a giant wig.
There will be a very plainly dressed woman, with perhaps a modest barrette in their hair, and a tissue in their hand.
“The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe” will be the most uninteresting story in the world. “Harold and the Purple Crayon” will cause children to pray for color blindness. And “101 Elephant Knock-Knock Jokes” will sound like it was written by Albert Camus.
[00:02:17] If the Proud Boys don’t like the magical experience Drag Queens offer, let them watch children suffocate while “Depressed Lesbian Story Hour” turns the room into a bell jar.
The one good thing is, it is quite possible that kids with ADD would grind to a halt and slip into a temporary coma during Depressed Lesbian Story Hour.
Can you imagine doctors telling parents of ADD children, “The medication has a 50/50 percent chance of working. But you know what we've been having consistent good luck with? ‘That Depressed Lesbian Story Hour’ over at the library on Saturday mornings in the Children’s room. Parents taking their ADD kids there report they really come off the ceiling for about 48 minutes. Obviously, it's not a permanent solution, but for some parents, it’s a little break they can give themselves on the weekend.”
[00:03:19] I am just kidding, of course. Not all lesbians are depressed. But all drag queens are fabulous.
FYI: I’ve put some links in the show notes about “Drag Story Hour.” My personal favorite is the one about a retired police office in Montana who turns out to be a Drag Queen fan!
[00:03:44]That’s all for now folks. Talk to you soon.
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